The following testimonies are unedited. They are simply copied and pasted to this page. To God be all the glory forever.

 

5 Years Saved & 5 Years Sober

The testimony you are about to read is lengthy; so, sit back, grab a tissue, a snack, blanket and a pillow. This testimony is 100% true and may be a trigger warning for some. If you are easily offended or easily pushed into episodes of mental health, discretion is advised.

My journey into the dark side of drugs began at an early age. Being raised in a broken home, with a mother who done the best she could; I was exposed to more than the average child has ever saw or should have to see. Being raised around addicts of all kinds (alcoholics, marijuana users, opiate users, etc.) exposed me to sex, and drugs and I was often left in a state of wonder as to Why God does my parents have to act this way?

When I was a young child around the age of 8 years old through 12 years old, I began to have surgeries to repair a hole in my left middle ear drum. I remember the medicine leaving me tired, foggy minded and itchy feeling. My mom even called the doctor once to tell them I was having an allergic reaction once because I was itching all over. But it was a good itch, and the mental feeling of numbness and that euphoria of not being in the dark, but rather being untouchable in mind was exhilarating. I was on cloud 9. I knew I loved it, and it was the best thing until that point that I had ever felt.

Around the age of 18, I had met my high school sweetheart and had gone through the process of a medical induced addict, family medicine cabinet addict and I was officially a marijuana user and a habitual opiate user. The only reason I hadn’t become addicted to opiates at that moment was because they were so hard to come by.

In my middle 20’s the OxyContin train hit Eastern Ky and surrounding states, extending all the way down the east coast. People from Eastern Ky would travel to other states just to go to the big time pharm doctors who were writing pills to anyone for just a few hundred dollars. These people would bring the medicine back to Eastern Ky and then distribute, all throughout the area. I was never one of the ones who traveled, but I quickly became one of the ones who distribution was made to; it was then that I became a frequent opiate user and shortly after that, an opiate addict. I’ll be as blunt as I can be with this, I was a pot head and a pill head. And I loved it. With everything I had experienced as a child, and through school, I was sold into the world of drugs, drugs, drugs. I didn’t have a care in the world, except for how can I get more, and how not to feel. Once, entering this world I would make it my home and lose everything I ever loved including my first two children until the age of 31.

Back track a little to the darkest part of my addiction. When I was 28 years old, my Daddy dropped a bomb on me. He told he had cancer and was given 18 months to live. I never knew dark until I entered dungeon dark. Like a black hole sucking the universe inside an abyss to be destroyed, the fun and games was over with, and playing with the darts of death became my friend. Only, I was the one that was throwing the darts, and I was the target of my darts. I lost my mind. You see my daddy was my very best friend in the whole wide world. He was light in the darkness when I was a child. He was the one who didn’t live in the home. My daddy was my vent, he was my secret keeper, my hero. He was my everything and just like that, he was being taken from me. Life wasn’t fair and I didn’t want to go on without him. I was going to make sure of it too. Hello death let’s dance. Hello God, take me instead, and spare him please. Plagues begun to swim in my mind. Pill after pill after pill. It was also in these months that I met my now husband.

Me meeting Danny was a God sent to me, but a devil’s wrath to him. I was hell on wheels, and I just kept rolling. Shortly after meeting Danny I moved in with him and my Daddy followed me into the home. With Daddy dying in front of his eyes, and me playing with fire in front of him, I really do not know how Danny stood it. Danny took over the caregiver position of Daddy and I both. I got worse and worse and worse. I even shaved my hair off. Let me tell you, I had beautiful hair, long, thick and dark dyed black hair. What was I thinking? I’ll destroy myself and no one will want me, no one will love me then, and I’ll have no choice but to wither and die. That proved wrong. Danny cried as I shaved my head, and he loved me anyways; accepting me for me, when I was in the shape, I was in. Who is this man and where did he come from? Why was he still holding on? Looking back, I remember the initial thing that attracted me to Danny was he once went to church, and he had left to find himself a wife. But what he found was far from wife material, she wasn’t human at all. She was a dead person with someone up above taking a bicycle pump pushing air into her lungs to pump them up and as quick as the pump gave air, her lungs deflated. This person up above stayed busy for many months, pumping air into those deflating lungs. Who was that person above and why did that person care so much, why wouldn’t he just allow those lungs to stay deflated? I now know. His name was Jesus, and he kept those lungs inflated for his purpose, and he done it because he loved her.

My daily routine was getting up snort 3-4 pills, smoke a bunch of weed, leave the house and go out on pill patrol, and the occasional cocaine or heroin patrol, whatever I could grab, I done it. Daddy’s cancer got worse, and hospice took over. Hospice began to give him big pills, and lots of them, as frequent as he needed them. He’d sometimes get 60-90 pills a week. Out of those 60 pills I’d end up with about 20-30. His brain cancer got so bad he’d drop them like a drunk man, and like a little dog looking for a bone, I’d make sure to snatch them up, I went as far as searching his bed covers every day because I knew the goods were in there, little hidden crumbs of the life, I was chasing falling from my master’s table.

There were 3 days during my addiction that night grew even darker around me. The time was middle January 2015. Daddy dropped a whole bottle of pills and lost them, hospice resupplied his pills, and I found the ones he lost, did I initially steal them, no, but I did find them all over the floor. My thought was finders’ keepers, he wasn’t hurting they gave him more, so he obviously didn’t need these back. Those 90 pills lasted me 3 days. Let me add this, those were dilaudid 2’s extended release, and I was approximately 100 lbs. The first day I snorted about 20-30, along with God only knows how many benzos, the second and third day I done the same. Let me further explain, with extended-release medicine, not every bit of the medicine is released at once. It releases over a period of time, to keep the pain down longer. On the first day not only did I take enough to die, but by the second and third day rolled around my funeral should have already been over with. I remember those nights clearly as I went to sleep, I was praying God please don’t me die. I knew something was up, I could feel it in my body, and as I slept, I saw darkness, and redness in the background. I never saw flames, but I saw the redness, and pitch black. It was an eerie shade of red orange and foggy but the black abyss in front of it is where I stopped. There was no falling involved, I only prayed as I feel asleep begging and pleading with God, please don’t let me die. I woke up, and the next morning and done it again. This continued for 3 nights in a row and on the 3rd night I had over 90 pills in my system that’s 180 mg, that’s more than one mg per pound of body weight. There’s no logical explanation other than the man with the pump, pumped overtime. After the 3rd day I still done pills, just not that many.

After that night my body started showing these weird changes, not addiction changes but something different. I paid close attention to it to. Red flags began to pop in my head. What on earth was going on with me and my body? I began to turn to Dr. Google and research these signs and symptoms. Dr. Google was telling me I was pregnant. I kept watching and watching and watching, noting everything, while still using, I kept the suspicion to myself at the time, but I was waiting for mother nature to show herself. I knew her date, and I knew what my body and Dr. Google was saying. But the tell-tell one was mother nature. Would mother nature make her appearance? The morning came, and nothing, ok, it may be later in the day, by night fall I was almost in shock, but ready to run to the store, and that’s exactly what I done. Dollar General here I come, speedway, it’s your turn now. Was Dr. Google right or was all this my imagination and wishful thinking? Did I have a reason to live or not?

As soon as I peed, two bright pink lines appeared. I cried and began to shake, off to the ER I went for confirmation, I mean you can get one false positive but what are the odds in 2 in the same night? They came in and told me you’re pregnant. — That man with the bicycle pump had a name now it was Jesus, and what he done for me that night I’ll forever remember. That isn’t all of it., the date that I got pregnant was the very days that I took all the pills. Not only did Jesus keep me alive but, he kept my child alive and within me, he kept that seed going. He gave not only me life from the dead, but he gave me a life inside of me, so I wouldn’t want to be dead. My pattern changed after that night; I only took enough medicine to keep my unborn child from going into spontaneous neonatal withdraw, which could have resulted in miscarriage.

When I was 3 weeks pregnant, Daddy was in nursing home because the cancer had gotten so bad in his to his brain, I remember it like it was yesterday, I was on my way to the nursing home, I stopped at Wendy’s for Food, I was going to McDonald’s but made the joke Wendy’s was cheaper. I walked in ordered food and set down. There was a familiar car that pulled in, my heart sank, in this car was my oldest kids, my pride and my pain. Syrus and Jaylah. They had no idea I was there, and I had no idea they were going to show up there, no one was on speaking terms. Those kids came in with their grandma, and is like something told them look there’s mommy, they came straight to me. They got so close that I finally reached out and grabbed them. I told them I was pregnant and that they were going to have a sibling. I reminded them how much I loved them and missed them. They went their way, and I went my way. This same day, I saw Daddy and I’ll never forget the words he spoke to me “I love you and you have a lot of growing up to you, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Daddy died the next morning. But I’ll never forget how Jesus gave me another sign of life when death came knocking on my door. If I could just have one more conversation with him, I’d tell him “Daddy, I’m trying, and Jesus has saved me, and when he calls me home, you’ll be the 2nd person I hug.”

Danny and I ended up married in the summer of 2015, I was seven months pregnant, you know what else, I ended up buying my wedding dress in the fall of 2014, I had bought it bigger, I didn’t know why I had bought a dress that was 2 sizes to big, but now I do, Daddy got to see my wedding dress, and I needed it a larger size because of my pregnancy. Every little girl’s dream is for her Daddy to see her wedding dress, and for him to walk her down the aisle, he saw my dress, and he may not have physically been there but, in my heart he was.

During my pregnancy I ended up getting into a program for pregnant women and I got of the drugs. In the end of 2016 I became unhappy again, and this time the devil offered me everything that had a name. Except Peace, the devil and all his lies cannot give you peace. I began to question life, I began to question what my Daddy would tell me to do, but what I got was so much more. I was sent a helper. This helper was Holy Ghost filled; she was a woman filled with the Spirit of the Lord. I cried every time I talked to her. Her voice alone made me cry, she could speak one word to me, and I’d cry. She told me one day “Christie you have to get control over yourself” What I told her next flipped my lid, I said “You don’t understand, I feel God with you”. I knew Jesus was real, (aside the times mentioned above, read through the rest of my blogs and you’ll see him more in my life,) but this encounter was different. Listen, I had been baptized before, made my confession, but I had never had an encounter with Jesus until this day. You see, I’ve always heard people say, “Tell me you’re a Christian without saying you’re a Christian” She done just that. He was lord of her world, he radiated through her, and he went before her and after her, that’s why I felt him when she spoke. Before her voice was his presence. Behind her words, was his wisdom and his heart. She listened to me, and all my what would Daddy want questions, an in reply she fed the me the anointed word of God. What’s the difference in the anointed word of God and someone just speaking the word of God, The POWER behind it. I read every and listened to every word she told me. I remember feeling a tugging at my heart too, so I began to talk to other people about what Daddy would want. My uncle and now church family, my mother and I drove them all crazy during this time, all of them told me the same thing. I even told my mother to shut up because I didn’t want to hear it. I wanted to know what Daddy wanted, not what God wanted.

On New Year’s Eve of 2016, I spent the night partying away with friends. I was back to not caring about anything, but I was wondering about God though, even though I didn’t want no part of him I wondered what he really wanted from me. I even asked the ones I was with about God. During this time let me note, I was going to a suboxone clinic, but had broken back over to smoking marijuana, and a lot of marijuana. I smoked more pot than what you see in the movies. I was the epitome of a pot head. But. this pot head was about to get a wakeup call.

I returned home on January 1st, 2017, said bye to my friends, came in and was in a million pieces. Still, texting my helper in Jesus, the one who Jesus sent to me, I was now asking about God, and less about Daddy. Danny had to run an errand, and my son who Jesus had given me in the loss of my Daddy, was at that toddling stage had scattered the books everywhere. From that moment on Jesus took over.

Danny picked up the bible and began to place it in the bookshelf, I told him I was going to read that bible. It never occurred to me to read the bible. Prior to this, the only time I looked at the bible was when I wanted a cute quote out of it. I told Danny I’ll just read Daddy’s bible instead. Danny left, and there I was alone with Eli, and my helper on the other end of the phone, I picked up Daddy’s bible. Jesus met me there. I sat there in my living room floor, tear filled eyes, and I looked up what salvation was, I read it all out loud, and searched out every verse reading it out loud too, then followed repentance, I read the meaning and then the verses.

At that very moment, I cried out to Jesus. I asked him to please save my soul, and to forgive me of my sins. I felt him come into my body, I felt my body die, I felt my body come back to life, I was born again. The verse in John 3:3 came alive to me, except a man be born again he cannot enter into the Kingdom of Heaven. I remember texting my helper and telling her I was saved, and all about what I had just experienced. I had the most amazing experience of my life. The old me died that day. And a new me emerged from the floor of hell. Raised up by Christ himself, I was alive, I was really alive, and I was really saved, and I felt it. I felt him. I knew I was a new me.

The next day I went back to the suboxone clinic, and again Jesus touched me, he told me to lay down the suboxone. I was scared at first, but after talking to my helper she told me to just listen and he would help me, So I did. Listen I had just paid for that month’s visit, I could have made over 2000 dollars off that prescription, but with the help of Jesus I laid them down. My legs hurt for bout 7 days, but not bad. My helper who was filled with the Holy Ghost would pray for me and the pain would go out of my legs and out my feet. She stood and gave testimony at her church, there was a woman there that worked in a clinic; that woman told her the hand of God was upon me because Suboxone is the roughest drug there is to come off of, it lands a lot in the hospital and many relapse. I’ve heard others describe it as a getting snake bitten all over their body, and the withdrawals usually last 4 weeks or longer, but not mine, why because, I gave them to Jesus, and he took it away.

About 2 years into my walk with Jesus, my walk got tough, and I decided no more, I’m going to be the old me again. Heaven came to my rescue again. I didn’t back slide, but Jesus himself placed his hand upon my head that night. And told me of a time I could have died, it was those 3 nights I took all the pills. He told me he kept me alive for his purpose, and for his will. He told me I’d lead many to him.

So, as I bring my testimony to a close, let me ask you something? Are you an addict? Do you know where you’re going to go if you die while under the influence of Drugs? Do you know that hell is very real? Do you know that in hell there is weeping and gnashing of teeth and the worm dieth not? Do you know about the rich man and the begger in the bible? Do you know Jesus? And if you say you do, do you have a relationship with him?

I invite you to have a conversation with me in private. You pour out your tears and you pour out your story, no judgement, and no bible thumping, I just simply want you to know you’re not alone. I am with you, and there’s one greater than me that is with you, and he will give you to drink of a living fountain, one that flows freely, and one that can break any chain you’re bound by. Let me say, you don’t have to be addicted to drugs to be an addict, you can be addicted to anything, even darkness. Take my hand. & Let me help you.

Remember you’re not alone in this.

I love you and Jesus loves you Most!

 C

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My name is Dhruba Kumar Pariyar. I am from Nepal. I was born in a Hindu family. One day a friend called me to eat what had been offered to a Hindu deity. But his mother did not allow him to give me the food because, she said, “You are from the low caste so you should not take the things offered to a deity.” My friends were surprised at hearing this about me and began looking at me as if I were some stranger.  I was unable to control my tears and I ran home. This is only one event in many that demonstrates the pain and shame my heart grew up with. There seemed no way to ever escape from this stigma.

But one day I met a follower of Christ who took me to a Christian church. There I had the opportunity to hear and to know about the Lord Jesus Christ. I felt the love of God when I heard and read from the Bible that all men were created equal: “There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Galatians 3:28). “For we were all baptized by one Spirit into one body: whether Jews or Greeks, slaves or free, and we were all given the same Spirit to drink” (1 Corinthians 12:13). These words from God brought great joy and a satisfying peace to my empty and burdened heart. That moment, I received Jesus Christ as my personal Savior and Lord. As time went on, I could see my life changing, and I found value and purpose to the life God had always intended me to have; all because of Jesus Christ. So, I was baptized in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, on December 17th, 2004. I also have discovered Jesus to be the love, light and peace of the world. 

 

DKP

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While doing street corner evangelism awhile back in a VERY bad Philly neighborhood I remember the Lord stirring my mind up to remembrance about what He would be to me in times of peril and imminent danger…”He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will remain secure and rest in the shadow of the Almighty (whose power no enemy can withstand) Psalm 91:1 Amplified version. I caught myself saying out loud that the  Lord is my (‘our’ because there was a group of us) refuge and our fortress; my confidence and trust was in our God and that He would save us from any traps, pestilence, terrors by night or arrows by day and that He would protect us beneath His pinions! (verses 4-5). The drug gang showed up brandishing weapons, menacing looks on their faces but did nothing. We, of course knew what was restraining them from doing us harm! We knew that because we had made the Lord our dwelling place and refuge He allowed no evil to befall us!

What a great evening of sharing the glorious, super-powerful gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ! People were translated from the kingdom of darkness to the kingdom of light! And the people of God were embolden to share their faith!

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RF

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I would like to share my miracle story with others to help inspire them and give them hope it’s a way of me paying forward. 

 

My name is Carina Imbrogno and I was born in 1974 in Buenos Aires, Argentina to Italian immigrants. I was born with a rare genetic disorder called Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome kyphoscoliosis type, but it was not diagnosed until 2015. This illness caused me to have severe scoliosis kyphosis since the age of two. I am the youngest of eight children.  We were four girls and four boys.  My oldest sister died from Leukemia as a toddler.  I grew up with a very difficult father.  I realized years later that my father was always ashamed of me because of the way I looked. Growing up I was also bullied and teased by other kids due to my very prominent rib hump.  Having many surgeries and wearing orthopedic braces wasn't easy!  

 

I began wearing orthopedic braces and body casts from the age 2 to the age of 11 and then again as an adult.  I had my first open back surgery at 10 years old.  My spine was collapsing so fast I was having trouble breathing.  The doctors explained to us that I needed emergency open back surgery  because my ribs were collapsing on my lungs making it difficult to breathe.  I had a curve of 89 degrees and another curve of 56 degrees. Doctors explained to us that I have a deadly type of kyphoscoliosis and without surgery I would die.  I had surgery and had a rod put in to stop my spine from curving any further. 

 

Unfortunately I had complications.  A few days after being sent home from the hospital I developed a very high fever.  I went to see the doctor and he discovered I had a massive infection from the surgery. I almost died from this infection which left me hospitalized for three months.  Fortunately the infection finally healed but over time the rod that was put in as a child began giving me problems.  By the time I was 18 the rod had somehow moved out of place and doctors think it was causing my migraine headaches.  I finally had to go for another surgery to remove part of the rod.  My migraine headaches finally went away. However I struggled with my severe and painful rib hump and was always fearful that I would never find anyone because of the way I looked.

 

In 1996 I was accepted to go to school at the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York City to study textile design.  I graduated in 2000 with a grade point average of 3.8.  My art teacher Susan Rietman who I am very close to always supported me in my work and motivated me to believe in myself.  Shortly after I graduated I met someone and got married but, sadly found myself in an abusive relationship.  After I separated from my abusive husband I was diagnosed with endometriosis. I had five abdominal surgeries for this illness which resulted in more complications.  It was a very painful illness to endure.   During this time I had a dream of God telling me that I would go through many difficulties but I wouldn't die and He would always be with me. In late 2004 I had a surgery to correct my prominent rib hump but it was unsuccessful and caused my spine to collapse at a fast rate.  I have a very rare and aggressive type of kyphoscoliosis. The doctors told me they couldn't help and that I would end up in a wheelchair and then die. I remained bedridden and highly medicated to stay alive.  By 2006 I had a side curve of 115 degrees and a concave curve of 120 degrees.  I felt hopeless and very scared. No doctor would touch me because my condition was so severe and complex and I only had State insurance which doesn't cover a $500,000 plus surgery.

 

One night I had a dream of a white light-filled Being who put His hand through me and straighten my spine.  Afterwards in my dream I stood up and walked away.  Two weeks later I found the doctor who saved my life. My oldest sister Ana took me to Texas where this doctor was able to correct my collapsed spine and rib hump. I have two rods and 26 screws holding my spine and had nine ribs cut and reduced in size to minimize the rib hump.  I grew five inches from the surgery.  This was a miracle for me.  The success of my operation was called a miracle by Dr. Shelekov and his entire team who preformed the operation. I am forever grateful for what he did for me. Unfortunately he passed away two years later.

 

After the spinal surgery I was doing so well that I was able to take a trip to Argentina to see my parents.  I especially wanted to see my mother who hadn't believed I was well.  Unfortunately a couple of years after my surgery I started to suffer from severe depression and anxiety.   I had never felt this way before.  The doctors eventually  discovered I had ovarian failure and was going into early menopause. There were no medications I could tolerate due to the many side effects and sensitivities I have.  At this point I was 33 years old.  I was living in my brother's basement at this time and my unmedicated depression and anxiety got so bad that I spent four years feeling hopeless and bed ridden. The one person who gave me hope was Father Frank who visited me.   In 2013 I went to the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota where they discovered I had pelvic floor muscle dysfunction which added to my IBS making it hard to go to the bathroom.  

 

Amidst of all this suffering one day in 2013 I got a letter in the mail saying I was next on the list to rent a small apartment for people with disabilities in Stamford, CT.  The news made me so happy because I had waited for eight years for this opportunity, but at the same time I was scared due to my many health issues.  By October of 2014 I was so ill that I wasn't able to drink or eat and weighed only 92 pounds. I remember calling my college professor Susan Rietman who advised me to come to Mount Sinai where they were able to find a treatment that I could tolerate.  Another miracle. I spent my 40th birthday in Mount Sinai hospital.  At this time I was praying to God and I promised Him if He saved my life once again I would start drawing and painting since art was always something I wanted to do.  After a few weeks I began feeling better but just a few days after being discharged from the hospital I came down with a pulmonary embolism and once again landed in the hospital.  Doctors warned me if the blood thinners didn't work I could die. I was petrified but I kept thinking about my dream with God and somehow I knew I was going to be okay.   

 

A year before when I watched a movie called Heaven is For Real I was introduced to the artist Akiane Kramarik's life and work.  This child prodigy inspired me to do art, especially to paint.  Her story about meeting God helped me to see and believe that my dreams where for real.  

 

As soon as I was better a close friend of mine David Anderson helped financially to buy art supplies to start my art.  He always believed in me even when I doubted.  I began to teach myself how to draw and paint. I am mostly self taught in fine arts. I should mention that for me learning is a true challenge because I have Attention Deficit Disorder and Retention Deficit Disorder, two challenging learning disabilities. I've discovered that I am able to learn best hands on.  So for the past four years I've been drawing and painting in different mediums such as gouache, dyes, watercolors, color pencil, graphite, acrylics, oils and pastels. Because of my disabilities and limitations I work a lot from photographs. 

 

I started doing portraits after I began volunteering in a daycare doing arts and crafts with children once a week. They inspire me to draw and paint them.  I also draw and paint animals.  I also love to paint animals, including people's pets.  I work with a lot of details so my work looks highly realistic. I have a true passion for what I do. I have entered over 10 juried exhibits where my work was accepted in all the shows. In January of 2017 I won third place at the Stamford Art Association.  I entered the very first portrait I ever did which was of my mother, who sadly I'm losing to Alzheimer's disease.  Winning with the portrait of my mother meant so much to me.  I went on to win first place with the portrait of Jaden in graphite at the Rowayton Art center. And I won third place with a graphite portrait of Melissa. My accomplishments have made me work ever harder.  My story was published in a Spanish newspaper called La Voz and most recently it was published in English and Spanish in a magazine called Latin Colors..  You can go to the following link,Carina Imbrogno, Artist and Champion of Life – Liber-Art. 

 

I'm very grateful for the connections I've made through Instagram.  I got very inspired by a friend on Instagram by the name of Richard Macwee who is based in Scotland and is an amazing wildlife artist.  His work inspired me to continue drawing animals. I also feel very grateful and blessed to have migrated with my famliy to the USA where my life has been saved so many times.  My goal is to eventually teach what I know and to keep getting better and better at what I do.  I am open to trying different techniques. I have my studio is my small living room but I hope to one day have a studio away from my apartment.  

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C.I.

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God has done too much for me.  But in a short testimony, when I was in my lowest, God used a random preacher to speak to me, telling me stuff only I knew I was going thru, letting me know that He saw me, He really saw me and in that moment I felt restored again. God is good. God bless you

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ML

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